Pages

Thursday, January 27, 2011

#5 Womanizers Flood

My work phone is this simple piece of shit:
This is actually much better than the phone I had prior to this "upgrade," which was this relic. (Nextel.  Remember them?  Push to talk, y'all.)

Instead of a phone, I call it a baby monitor.
"Wah. My fridge doesn't work!"
"Boo Hoo. I locked myself out."
"Someone's parking in my spot. Harumph!"
"WAH.  I'm hot! Teach me how to use the A/C."

The baby call I hate most is "My place is flooded."
This has happened on more than one occasion.  The most memorable was one at 2:30 am on a Saturday night.  I was passed out from a night of drinking.
*Ring Ring*
Me: ugh...hello...
Tenant: Hey, Mapple, it's raining in our place.
Me: Let me put some pants on, and I'll be up there.

I go up to the 11th floor, and their place, is indeed raining.  The floors are concrete, and concrete is porous.  If the unit above has a lot of water on the floor, then it will leak straight into the unit below.  I go to the penthouse unit directly above them to see what was going on.
After knocking on the door, and no answer, I bust in with my master key.  I am allowed to do this, as it is considered an emergency.
Upon entering, I am standing in a shallow pool of water covering the entire floor.  I then hear
"Who's there? *splash splash* Oh shit, there's water everywhere.

Turns out, this tenant's toilet is flooding, and has been for however long it takes to flood an 880 sqft space.  The dumb bitch was just sleeping through it.  She's all distraught because her laptop is ruined, as it was laying on the floor. She tells me she's a singer-songwriter, all of her music was on it, and she's never backed up her hard-drive.

Now, when I hear singer-songwriter, I think of a girl singing about ex-boyfriends to tourists with her guitar case open for tips.  What singer-songwriter can afford a penthouse? Apparently, the one that wrote this song.

She calls her husband and explains to him that the toilet was "just silently flooding." BULLSHIT.  You know that noise that toilets make when they're running. It is most definitely not silent.
In my drunken stupor, I just start soaking up water with towels.  I call maintenance, and he comes over 20 minutes later to mop it up.  I'm drunk, tired, wet from the knees down, and very angry, as that bitch just sits on her spiral staircase complaining about her computer and taking shots of Patron.  Not helping, not offering.

The culprit of the toilet flood was a maxi pad lodged in the pipe.  Every woman over the age of 13 knows you are not supposed to flush that shit.  

After that gets cleaned up, I then have to deal with the guys in the unit below, and the water that has leaked into their place.  Insurance matters ensue, and it's a huge bitch.

There went 2.5 hours of precious, drunken sleep-time.
This job sucks.

4 comments:

chenlili said...

louis vuitton
christian louboutin shoes
coach outlet
retro jordans 13
burberry outlet
louis vuitton handbags
ugg boots
michael kors outlet clearance
ugg boot uk
michael kors outlet clearance
boston celtics jerseys
uggs on sale
uggs for women
ralph lauren outlet
true religion uk
jordan 3 retro
ugg boots
michael kors outlet
louis vuitton purses
supra for sale
michael kors outlet clearance
discount jordans
michael kors outlet
ray ban sunglasses outlet
kate spade outlet
jordan 3 white cenment
kevin durant 8 shoes
ralph lauren outlet
fitflops
coach outlet
adidas shoes
ray ban sunglasses
dallas mavericks jerseys
vans shoes
louis vuitton
coach factory outlet
gucci handbags
tory burch handbags
chenlili20160824

chenmeinv0 said...

louis vuitton outlet stores
christian louboutin heels
adidas superstar trainers
oakley sunglasses
ugg boots
ugg sale
canada goose jackets clearance
uggs for women
discount ugg boots
pandora rings
2016.11.30xukaimin

chenmeinv0 said...

coach factory outlet
true religion jeans
ralph lauren polo
adidas superstar trainers
parker jotter ballpoint pens
nike air max 90
prada outlet
true religion outlet
rolex watches clearance
gucci belts
2017.2.23xukaimin

xumeiqing said...

20170512meiqing
michael kors uk
birkenstock sandals
adidas uk
dolce and gabbana outlet
michael kors outlet
cheap nike shoes
longchamp bags
ralph lauren sale clearance
cheap nfl jerseys
oklahoma city thunder jerseys

Post a Comment

 
Copyright (c) 2010 being a building manager is awful. Design by WPThemes Expert

Blogger Templates and RegistryBooster.