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Tuesday, November 13, 2012

#56 Adult Education - The End

************If this is your first time reading this blog, DO NOT start here.  Please go to the archives, where you should start with the very first blog.  This is essentially a story with a beginning and an end.  You don't read books beginning with the last chapter, you didn't start with the 10th episode of Season 2 of Game of Thrones (you'd be all "who's Ned Stark?"), so why would you read this blog about this fucking dumbass job backwards?
Please whisk yourself away to when this journey began in January of 2011.  Oh hey, and thanks. Glad to see you.******************



After some thought, I realized some things and learned some lessons from this chapter of employment that maybe you can use in life.

I should have reconsidered the job choice when:
  1. I knew a woman like Pigeon had access to me, via phone, 24-hours a day. Get out before it's too late.
  2. After collecting thousands of people's money in rent and handing out notices for fines and complaints, I realized that I was everything I hated...The MAN.  Damn The Man. Don't Let the Man Get You Down.
  3. It was revealed that the boss is a ridiculous one-percenter that doesn't care about the well-being of people. Examples?  Okay!
    • He puts a washer and dryer in everyone's unit. Great, right?  WRONG.  It is one of those tiny European style washer/dryer-in-one combos.  They wash your dry, dirty clothes, and four hours later, you get soapy, wet clothes. Pretty sure he hasn't done his own laundry in decades.
    • The first time I met The Boss was a few weeks after I was already working.  He comes in my office and instead of greeting me, his brand new employee that is going to take care of one of his buildings and help him collect millions of dollars a year, he prattles off to Charlotte as to why she should get married or dump her boyfriend...for an hour.  He didn't acknowledge me once. 
    • The only act of kindness and appreciation he had for his employees was when he gave us a frozen turkey one day before Thanksgiving.

    Remember: Rent is NEVER free.
    This job sucked my asshole.  It was not worth the "free" rent. 
    *This also applies to moving back in with your parents as an adult. The price you pay is living with your parents.  Also, what is it about we as adults, that when we get near our parents, we revert back into being whiny 15-year olds?*
We never stop learning, folks.

Speaking of, I recently learned that Pigeon put in her notice to move.  This bothers me because she was my burden in this building, and mine alone. What if the only reason why she stayed was because I humored her by talking to her?  WHAT IF PIGEON WAS JUST A MANIFESTATION THAT I BROUGHT UNTO MYSELF!?!?!?! 

So what now?  Well, I got myself another job that is actually way better, allows me to go on my auditions and be an actor, it's a half block away from my place, and I don't have to answer one goddamn phone call.  However, I'm pretty sure no one wants to read "Being an Office Manager at a Small Architecture Firm is Pretty Cool: www.prettycoolgig.com," so I guess this is it, gang.

Thanks so much for reading my tales.  I started this blog as a way to just tell all my friends at once the horror of the things I faced.  I leave it as a cautionary tale for all.
This is how I feel about you, literate friends:
Approved!
Let's not hit the nail over the head by adding an additional a picture of me using a different finger to express my feelings towards my former employers.  You get it.

4 comments:

D3FUS3 said...

I just found out about this site from Reddit. I skimmed though your stories and I want more.

I want to bring a little bit of your old job back with a some unnecessary, "entitlement". You owe me, you can't leave us hanging like that cat on that poster. We need more stories from your new job or about random shit!

TaraSayWhat? said...

Well. Yay for your new job, and Boo for us readers. Good luck at the new place!

Erin said...

Yay! Glad you got a new job that will let you audition. How did you do that? I have stayed at my same job for 8 years because they let me audition and sometimes I want to kill them though. Whenever I try to look for jobs, auditions aren't welcomed almost anywhere and this is coming from a person who has called out 2 times in 8 years and sometimes has 3-7 auditions in a week but I always make up all my hours. How did you do it?

And this has been the most entertaining blog I have ever read. . . seriously.

Anonymous said...

The sad end of a golden era

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